As you sow, so shall you reap

Salok, First Mehla: Night is the summer season, and day is the winter season; sexual desire and anger are the two fields planted.

Greed prepares the soil, and the seed of falsehood is planted; attachment and love are the farmer and hired hand.

Contemplation is the plow, and corruption is the harvest; this is what one earns and eats, according to the Hukam of the Lord’s Command.

O Nanak, when one is called to give his account, he will be barren and infertile. ||1||


First Mehla: Make the Fear of God the farm, purity the water, truth and contentment the cows and bulls,

humility the plow, consciousness the plowman, remembrance the preparation of the soil, and union with the Lord the planting time.

Let the Lord’s Name be the seed, and His Forgiving Grace the harvest. Do this, and the whole world will seem false.

O Nanak, if He bestows His Merciful Glance of Grace, then all your separation will be ended. ||2||

Pauree: The self-willed manmukh is trapped in the darkness of emotional attachment; in the love of duality he speaks.

The love of duality brings pain forever; he churns the water endlessly.

The Gurmukh meditates on the Naam, the Name of the Lord; he churns, and obtains the essence of reality.

The Divine Light illuminates his heart deep within; he seeks the Lord, and obtains Him.

He Himself deludes in doubt; no one can comment on this. ||17||

O Nanak, don’t be anxious; the Lord will take care of you.

He created the creatures in water, and He gives them their nourishment.

There are no stores open there, and no one farms there.

No business is ever transacted there, and no one buys or sells.

Animals eat other animals; this is what the Lord has given them as food.

He created them in the oceans, and He provides for them as well.

O Nanak, don’t be anxious; the Lord will take care of you. ||1||

First Mehla: O Nanak, this soul is the fish, and death is the hungry fisherman.

The blind man does not even think of this. And suddenly, the net is cast.

O Nanak, his consciousness is unconscious, and he departs, bound by anxiety.

But if the Lord bestows His Glance of Grace, then He unites the soul with Himself. ||2||

Pauree: They are true, forever true, who drink in the sublime essence of the Lord.

The True Lord abides in the mind of the Gurmukh; He strikes the true bargain.

Everything is in the home of the self within; only the very fortunate obtain it.

The hunger within is conquered and overcome, singing the Glorious Praises of the Lord.

He Himself unites in His Union; He Himself blesses them with understanding. ||18||

Salok, First Mehla: The cotton is ginned, woven and spun;

the cloth is laid out, washed and bleached white.

The tailor cuts it with his scissors, and sews it with his thread.

Thus, the torn and tattered honor is sewn up again, through the Lord’s Praise, O Nanak, and one lives the true life.

Becoming worn, the cloth is torn; with needle and thread it is sewn up again.

It will not last for a month, or even a week. It barely lasts for an hour, or even a moment.

But the Truth does not grow old; and when it is stitched, it is never torn again.

O Nanak, the Lord and Master is the Truest of the True. While we meditate on Him, we see Him. ||1||


Hukham I received when I asked about Argentina.
http://www.sikhitothemax.com/Page.asp?SourceID=G&PageNo=955

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A New Chapter to Write

in my book of life is beginning today. I am off to live in Argentina for four months. I am scared, and excited, and nervous. So much planning and thought has happened in the past 6 months to lead me to this moment. When you spend so much time and energy focusing on one thing, off in the distant future somewhere, when it finally appears in the headlights it is still a surprise. I got so used to thinking about going to Argentina, actually leaving it’s like, “Wait, WHAT am I doing?!?”

I know in my gut that this experience is going to be mind-blowing, life-altering, eye-opening. My only expectation is that I am open to learn whatever I can down there.

It is silly that I am so nervous really, I mean I have been away from home for 9 months at a time when I attended Miri Piri Academy in India for high school. http://www.miripiriacademy.org/ That was totally different though. I had already visited the school before I went for my first year and I had friends already there. Also, the school had a big focus on Kundalini yoga, meditation and living a Sikh lifestyle.

Ah well, no use fussing now, it is happening, haha and there is nothing I can do about it, although I did have thoughts of just not going…

The unknown can be so scary sometimes, even if it is something that you want so badly and have been planning for! It feels like now that

This program will be a great test for me to be able to maintain who I am in a different environment. They say that your environment helps to shape who you are, so I am excited (and nervous) to get out of the comfort zone of my family and the community I have grown up in, and be cast out into the wide open world. I have been yearning for this opportunity to do something hands on instead of sitting in classes taking notes all day and long nights at the library. This program is focused on experiential-based learning. YES! One of the seminars I am taking, Regional Integration, Development, and Social Change is going to consist of excursions around the city of Buenos Aires, to rural Argentina, Brazil and Paraguay and Uruguay! Praise the Lord! This is awesome!

Don’t worry, I’ll update my blog whenever I get a chance and will upload tons of pictures.

This trip is forcing me to ask myself a lot of important questions, like Who Am I? I know that sounds all “woo woo” but I’m serious. I’m at a point in my life where I am developing consistencies within myself that I will maintain throughout my life. It’s pretty awesome.

I have so much to look forward to in my life! I want to be able to serve many people during my life. I also want to have a happy home life. I know I’ve got some more adventures around the world to fulfill first. I’m reminding myself to look forward to that, but also be in this moment and enjoy my life, no matter what I am doing or who I am with.

Happiness runs in a circular motion

Life is like a little boat upon the sea

Everybody is a part of everything anway

You can have it all if you let yourself be

Why-o? Because!

Anxiety

it seems to be consuming me lately. I think it is because I can feel time slipping through my fingers with each passing second and I’m forgetting that frantically trying to hold onto the movement of time is futile.

I am also kind of overall just frustrated with myself because I have really made procrastination an art. The unconscious avoidance of what I need to do is so great now that, oh man, it’s really starting to catch up with me. I need to get a hold on this. I need to be able to PLAN AHEAD. This would really help with my whole anxiety issue.

What the heck are we all doing here? It is so weird, I mean we all want to be loved, we all, I think, want to be good and do good but there are such varying degrees of how far someone is willing to go to do these things and how much they care. Sometimes it seems that in order for someone to really take that next step and go above and beyond something big had to happen in their life to change them and make them put in that extra effort. Is that the case? I dunno, but I guess it’s my little theory.

Ugh, another thing lately, I just feel like I’ve been acting selfish, entitled and arrogant as hell. I mean, you are probably like whoa, why is she saying this, why does she think I care to hear about her problems, whats wrong with this girl….

Well, I feel like I would like to address that. I am writing like this because it is somewhat liberating for me to be all like “splat this is my brain in words” cause i mean, we are all human, we all think weird shit but don’t say it, but if we all are so goddam weird in our heads why not be able to share it, and accept someone else like that, weird shit and all. I mean and here is this arrogance thing again, am I trying to feel accepted by writing this blog? Maybe! Who knows! I will accept that possibility. Ya know I think another big reason why I am writing this blog is because I can just imagine that some people might react to it, like “omg!”, “wtf!” or, “huh?!” and it is amusing for me to imagine your face as you read this. I will do almost anything to make myself laugh, including writing a weird ass blog with all my word vomit in it yes. I mean I think there is a lot of valuable stuff in here, meditations, inspirational things, but there is also a bunch of strange stuff…like this post right here.

So anyway, yeah been feeling like wow girlfriend, you are not better than them, get that idea outta your head right now young lady!

Many many people over the years have told me that I think too much. I guess if so many people have told me this it must be true, right? I’m def working on learning how to drown out the brain chatter and tune into my intuition and let it take over. Then my brain is like “ahhhh, silence”.     🙂

 

Learn to live alone

[Gurmukhi]


English Translation:

Sorat’h, Ninth Mehl: O dear friend, know this in your mind. The world is entangled in its own pleasures; no one is for anyone else. ||1||Pause|| In good times, many come and sit together, surrounding you on all four sides. But when hard times come, they all leave, and no one comes near you. ||1|| Your wife, whom you love so much, and who has remained ever attached to you, runs away crying, “”Ghost! Ghost!””, as soon as the swan-soul leaves this body. ||2|| This is the way they act – those whom we love so much. At the very last moment, O Nanak, no one is any use at all, except the Dear Lord. ||3||12||139||

Learn to live unattached…to anything! Your comforts of a 1st-world life, your house, your family, your friends. All will leave you in the end, so learn to live alone and be happy with your Self. Then you will also be able to really appreciate things and beautiful people when the come to grace your life with their presence. Learn to live for YOU, but not for who you think you are, or who other tell you you are, live for your infinite you, for The Infinite within you. Live for the infinite love which surrounds you. Living a life with this focus is truly a blessed life.

Live in such a way that you may fulfill the deepest longing of your soul to merge back with the the infinite.

find peace within yourself

This is the ultimate gift you can give to yourself. This is the ultimate way you can express love to yourself.

Meditation to Experience God:

-Hands: Surya Mudra (thumb and ring finger touching)

-Posture: sit cross-legged, with a straight spine (you can place a pillow or rolled up blanket under you butt if this is hard for you)

-Eyes: closed, can be focused up and in at your third eye

-Listen: Rakhe Rakhanhar, by Singh Kaur (for the music, check out spiritvoyage.com)

-Time: 11-31 minutes

-Focus on: the amazing bliss you will feel if you let yourself have the experience! Just relax, allow yourself to feel anything you feel, to flow with the music.

It’s amazing

what is happening right now. I sense this surge of excitement, energy, positivity and inspiration coming from all of these amazing people! Everyone seems to be on a similar page, wanting to reach out and uplift others.

I can only smile, and do the same.

There.

is

so

much

hope

in the air.

Sometimes I just feel so much joy I am confused weather I’d rather dance or cry because of the intense beauty of it all.

Swimming in the Willamette

I’m finding joy in the simple pleasures of life, happy bumble bees buzzing in their buds, hugging people I love, and people I don’t. Dancing randomly. Meditating, reminding myself to just BE.

I AM. I AM.

Lately, this is hard to put into words, but, I am scratching the surface of a new understanding of how to live my life, how to relate to others, how to relate to myself. For most of my life I have lived from a very visceral place, satisfying my immediate desires, which is not conducive to spiritual advancement.

Of course, this is very basic stuff. I kind of laugh to myself now, well, with a bit of remorse, but I still laugh at the realization that this is all stuff I’ve been told before in my life by my parents and elders.

They are nice enough to not say, “I told you so”.

These days I am coming up to a wall covered in post-its of these big life questions. It’s like I could follow the wall and find a different route around, just, not deal with it now, or just start with one at a time and go from there. I can’t handle to transgress. I want to deal with my shit! I don’t want it to remain piled up in the back of my head to come back to haunt me later in life. I just have this sense that now is the time to get this tough self-examination out of the way, and I’m sure it never stops, but at least to start. I’m starting. A pile of post-it notes= daunting, 1 post-it note= not so scary, maybe even cute? Just a step at a time. I can do this.

I am understanding the importance of Sant Sipahi (Saint Soldier). I like this translation from SikWiki.org:

“This is a philosophy and a lifestyle which was first endorsed by Guru Hargobind, and later personified in Guru Gobind Singh. The order of the two words is important.

The first word in this phrase is “Sant” and so this has domination and means that the first duty of the Sikh is to be a “Sant” or to be a wise and knowledgeable person... The word is a modified form of the word “Sat” which can simply mean “True” but can also be translated as meaning lasting, real, wise and venerable. Sat or Satya has commonly been used since the Vedic times for the Ever-existent, Unchanging Reality or the Self-existent, Universal Spirit, Brahman or God. The word “Sant” which can be linked to “Sat” is not generally used in a formal sense and is a subjective word which refers to a person who is considered an able and wise. So the common translation of the word “Sant” is a wise, considerate, judicious and knowledgeable person who has a good understanding of Dharam or religion.
The second word in the phrase is “Sapahi”. So this “Sant” should also be a soldier able to fight and engage in warfare. A Sikh who cannot fight cannot be a “Sant-Sapahi” and would be lacking in the required qualities. So the second duty of a Sikh is to be able and ready to fight for a worthy cause and for the protection of righteousness and the weak. So the idea for being a warrior is to protect and defend the weak and oneself from any tyrants and bullies. Sikhs were taught to be kind as well as fearless. However, the Khalsa is forbidden to never engage in a first attack on any person for whatever reason. Only when all means have been exhausted and negotiations have failed can the sword be yielded in defence of a legitimate and worthy cause.”

I’m realizing the importance of conduction myself as a warrior in this life. There is so much that I need to be able to defend myself from. Things that are disguised to make life easier, more fun, exciting. They are there to be helpful, or so they say. I keep coming back to this, this card I picked when I asked what my destiny on this Earth was:

 The Rebel

Zen Tarot Card
The Rebel

People are afraid, very much afraid of those who know themselves. They have a certain power, a certain aura and a certain magnetism, a charisma that can take out alive, young people from the traditional imprisonment….

The enlightened man cannot be enslaved – that is the difficulty – and he cannot be imprisoned…. Every genius who has known something of the inner is bound to be a little difficult to be absorbed; he is going to be an upsetting force. The masses don’t want to be disturbed, even though they may be in misery; they are in misery, but they are accustomed to the misery. And anybody who is not miserable looks like a stranger.

The enlightened man is the greatest stranger in the world; he does not seem to belong to anybody. No organization confines him, no community, no society, no nation.

Osho The Zen Manifesto: Freedom from Oneself Chapter 9

Commentary:

The powerful and authoritative figure in this card is clearly the master of his own destiny. On his shoulder is an emblem of the sun, and the torch he holds in his right hand symbolizes the light of his own hard-won truth.

Whether he is wealthy or poor, the Rebel is really an emperor because he has broken the chains of society’s repressive conditioning and opinions. He has formed himself by embracing all the colors of the rainbow, emerging from the dark and formless roots of his unconscious past and growing wings to fly into the sky. His very way of being is rebellious – not because he is fighting against anybody or anything, but because he has discovered his own true nature and is determined to live in accordance with it. The eagle is his spirit animal, a messenger between earth and sky.

The Rebel challenges us to be courageous enough to take responsibility for who we are and to live our truth.

Deh Shiva

by Guru Gobind Singh

“Oh god, grant me this wish, may I never refrain from righteous acts, may I fight without fear all foes in life’s battle with confident courage claiming the victory, may my highest ambition be singing thy praises and may thy glory be enshrined in my mind, when this mortal life reaches its limits, may I die fighting with limitless courage.”

My dear friend,

…you have always been there for me when I needed you. I think that some show of appreciation is in order. I’ve been basking in your flowing tunes for years and you’ve helped me through some tears

…and some long nights at the library.

You make my heart swell. You  make me want to be like you, so fluid and perfect, like the way you love to caress my ears.

I fall deeper in love with you every time I hear you,

You just make me want to dance with reckless abandon, flinging my body parts in all directions with no tecnique at all. To let it all go and give it to you.

You make me feel like I could hold the air in my fists and shake the world.

You make me closer to my God.

Wake everyone up.

I almost feel like I’ve got a special love affair with everyone who births you into this world for me to nurture in my heart. Your mothers and fathers have such courage and grace in how they care for you and present you to the world.

My dear music, I love you.

 

I think it’s about time I gave back…